The Lighthouse (2019): Spoiler-Free Review

Ironically, the scenes of violent masturbation were the least masturbatory thing about this film. I say this as someone who usually loves pretentious, artsy films that prioritise mood over narrative, but this picture felt extremely self-indulgent and turgid, an impression that wasn't diminished by reading about how Eggers "knew before even filming that the film just had to be shot on 35mm black and white at 1.19:1" and "was very precise about accent and delivery, and would, for example, give instructions to 'say the second sentence of your third line 75% faster'." Eggers also falls victim to the lazy horror trope of blasting the audience with images of mutilation and decay to disturb them, rather than letting the film do it.
With all that said, the set pieces are beautiful and Eggers does a great job at transporting the viewer to 1890s New England. On top of that is an infuriatingly precise and largely captivating performance from Willem Dafoe.